COSTA RICA OBSERVATIONS
These observations are a blast from the past! I wrote these in 2000-2001, it was my first time outside of the United States and I didn’t yet speak Spanish. EVERYTHING was different to me so there are a lot of observations. I haven’t been back to the country for quite some time now, so things could very well have changed. But while I was there this is what I observed. There are two parts to these observations. Hope you enjoy them.
1.) Maaaaan, I came down here all scared thinking with all these suave, Spanish speaking, good-looking Costa Rican men I was going to be put to shame and get no play. Thank God I was wrong! Costa Rican men are some of the corniest MF’s on the planet! They are short, dress like roadies from Twisted Sister or AC/DC and have no mic game at all. They have no respect or clue about women. It has taken me awhile to figure out what they are saying after asking my teachers....but how can a man of normal intelligence think asking a female if she swallows as you walk past her is going to make a woman turn around and smile at you!? I swear! It happens ALL the time here! Doesn’t matter if the boyfriend, brother or whatever male is walking, holding hands or kissing the female. Without fail at least 1 out of every 3 young males that pass will ask if she wants to A.) Suck dick B) Get poked in the bootie hole or C) Take a cum shower... I am not kidding! These are things that men say to women on the street in public! IN PUBLIC! No wonder the females in Costa Rica are always trying to date “Gringos” which means foreigner. Is their some ritual in the country where newborn males are dropped on their frontal lobes or something? I have NEVER seen a Tico (Costa Ricans call themselves Tico or Tica depending on the sex) pull a female using any of those lines..Yet they keep on doing it. Oh, oh, this is kinda another observation. Women don’t wear skirts here too often unless they are in large groups. They can’t because the men will actually stick their hands up under their skirts or try and pull them up as they walk past! What kinda fucced up shyte is that?? Women who wear skirts are like the newborn baby animals in those African Wildlife Preserves. All the males and female friends NOT wearing skirts are on the outside, with the skirt wearers on the inside. They form a protective ring around the women to keep out the retarded men who try to cop a feel.
2.) It is wrong. Wrong, wrong, wrong how Ticos act. But I can kinda see how living in a country with so many beautiful women can make you a little retarded. A little known fact, when a man gets an erection, the blood comes from his knee and his brain. That means he can’t run and he gets retarded. Might explain the first observation a tiny bit better. And Ticas aren’t just beautiful....but SEXY. Oh my Lord are they sexy! They walk like they have these little radios playing Salsa music in their heads as they walk. All the movement is from their waists and they are just dancing down the streets. Throw in how they all dress like at any moment there could be an audition for a Hip Hop video hoochie and it makes for some great people watching. Now, I am no woman, but if you are wearing jeans so tight that I can read the tag of your thong THROUGH your jeans....why even wear the damn things?? Is it just for the effect so the men know you are wearing a thong?? And backless shirts...Don’t women know that’s like putting a sign on your back in bright red letters that says look at my ass crack!? The line of your spine leads to your ass. How am I not supposed to stare!!?? I am only human!
2a.) Yes, Ticas are beautiful. Yes, Ticas are sexy. Oh yes, do Ticas have buns...But I have observed a very strange phenomenon here in Costa Rica. I call it Elephantitis. Let me explain this....not sure if it is an ailment or what. I will see a very attractive female, look at her eyes, gaze at the structure of her face, then her...you know, then her waist...then BAM, this phenomenon I call Elephantitis. It’s like someone took these normal looking women from the waist up, and implanted an elephants body on the lower half of their body. Some crazy shyte! I swear, really looks like some mad scientist chopped them in half, and just put an elephant on the bottom. How else do you explain someone with upper half of saaaaay, Halle Berry, or Jennifer Lopez and the lower half of the largest land mammal on Earth?? Tell me please! I LOVE a woman with big hips, thighs, ass, all of it. If I am dating a woman and she says she has gained 10kg and I am thinking about just mo ass fo me to luv. But if you are taking two pairs of jeans and stitching them together to make on pair....or if you can’t see that bone that sticks out from your ankle, but your upper body is really thin...I’m not drinking the water anymore. Has to be some parasite or virus causing that deformity. If all of them were that big, it would just be a really big woman. No big deal, I’ve seen many of those before in my life. But that whole mixmatch thing is not cool. Matter of fact it’s downright scary. I know! It was like in that movie with Eddie Murphy where he played Prof. Klump and he took that potion to be thin and after awhile it started wearing off....THAT is what a lot of females in Costa Rica look like. Now where are the scientists to explain that huh?!
3.) Costa Rica is a country that borders both the Pacific and the Atlantic Oceans. It is amazing how different the beaches are on either coast. On the Atlantic side the water is always much warmer and calmer than the Pacific side. But if you are a surfer, you have to be on the Pacific side. One constant thing is, no good looking women go to the beach in Costa Rica. I have gone to quite a few beaches here, the Atlantic and Pacific side...Seems like ONLY the women who should not be wearing bikinis are at the beach! All the attractive women stay in the cities. Or maybe there are special days for certain types of bodies on the beach and I don’t realize it. I am not talking about perfect 10 bodies, I just mean normal. I am saying that women who wear normal bottom bikinis look like they are wearing G-Strings because their asses got hungry and sucked up all that material. And in the front they look naked cause their stomach is hanging completely over the front of the bathing suit so you only see skin and think they are nude. It’s not just me either. Females from other countries have commented on this as well...the women in the cities who look amazing don’t go to the beach. Maybe because the men act so badly when they have on clothes and they are afraid to be out in swimsuits where those retards might act even more out of line....Damn Ticos!!
4.) Buses are cheap as hell to take in Costa Rica. And buses take you anywhere in this country. You need to get to the smallest village in the furthest corner? Sure you can find 3 buses that will take you there...They have a huge bus centers where you go to catch buses for certain regions of the country. Very straight forward system. For some reason, that organization hasn’t trickled down to the local bus system. I am in Heredia; it is the 3rd largest city in the COUNTRY. There are no bus stops anywhere in this city! I will walk down the street and see people standing in the most random places. I will ask what is this about... waiting for work, some type of group finishing a meeting. No, they are waiting for the bus. Go back to that place tomorrow to catch that bus...they aren’t there! Who decides where the stop is day to day?! Why does it have to be a secret?! Why can’t they just keep it in one spot?! Who are they trying to keep off the bus?!!? I have really researched this. I have looked all over the city for strange marks
These observations are a blast from the past! I wrote these in 2000-2001, it was my first time outside of the United States and I didn’t yet speak Spanish. EVERYTHING was different to me so there are a lot of observations. I haven’t been back to the country for quite some time now, so things could very well have changed. But while I was there this is what I observed. There are two parts to these observations. Hope you enjoy them.
1.) Maaaaan, I came down here all scared thinking with all these suave, Spanish speaking, good-looking Costa Rican men I was going to be put to shame and get no play. Thank God I was wrong! Costa Rican men are some of the corniest MF’s on the planet! They are short, dress like roadies from Twisted Sister or AC/DC and have no mic game at all. They have no respect or clue about women. It has taken me awhile to figure out what they are saying after asking my teachers....but how can a man of normal intelligence think asking a female if she swallows as you walk past her is going to make a woman turn around and smile at you!? I swear! It happens ALL the time here! Doesn’t matter if the boyfriend, brother or whatever male is walking, holding hands or kissing the female. Without fail at least 1 out of every 3 young males that pass will ask if she wants to A.) Suck dick B) Get poked in the bootie hole or C) Take a cum shower... I am not kidding! These are things that men say to women on the street in public! IN PUBLIC! No wonder the females in Costa Rica are always trying to date “Gringos” which means foreigner. Is their some ritual in the country where newborn males are dropped on their frontal lobes or something? I have NEVER seen a Tico (Costa Ricans call themselves Tico or Tica depending on the sex) pull a female using any of those lines..Yet they keep on doing it. Oh, oh, this is kinda another observation. Women don’t wear skirts here too often unless they are in large groups. They can’t because the men will actually stick their hands up under their skirts or try and pull them up as they walk past! What kinda fucced up shyte is that?? Women who wear skirts are like the newborn baby animals in those African Wildlife Preserves. All the males and female friends NOT wearing skirts are on the outside, with the skirt wearers on the inside. They form a protective ring around the women to keep out the retarded men who try to cop a feel.
2.) It is wrong. Wrong, wrong, wrong how Ticos act. But I can kinda see how living in a country with so many beautiful women can make you a little retarded. A little known fact, when a man gets an erection, the blood comes from his knee and his brain. That means he can’t run and he gets retarded. Might explain the first observation a tiny bit better. And Ticas aren’t just beautiful....but SEXY. Oh my Lord are they sexy! They walk like they have these little radios playing Salsa music in their heads as they walk. All the movement is from their waists and they are just dancing down the streets. Throw in how they all dress like at any moment there could be an audition for a Hip Hop video hoochie and it makes for some great people watching. Now, I am no woman, but if you are wearing jeans so tight that I can read the tag of your thong THROUGH your jeans....why even wear the damn things?? Is it just for the effect so the men know you are wearing a thong?? And backless shirts...Don’t women know that’s like putting a sign on your back in bright red letters that says look at my ass crack!? The line of your spine leads to your ass. How am I not supposed to stare!!?? I am only human!
2a.) Yes, Ticas are beautiful. Yes, Ticas are sexy. Oh yes, do Ticas have buns...But I have observed a very strange phenomenon here in Costa Rica. I call it Elephantitis. Let me explain this....not sure if it is an ailment or what. I will see a very attractive female, look at her eyes, gaze at the structure of her face, then her...you know, then her waist...then BAM, this phenomenon I call Elephantitis. It’s like someone took these normal looking women from the waist up, and implanted an elephants body on the lower half of their body. Some crazy shyte! I swear, really looks like some mad scientist chopped them in half, and just put an elephant on the bottom. How else do you explain someone with upper half of saaaaay, Halle Berry, or Jennifer Lopez and the lower half of the largest land mammal on Earth?? Tell me please! I LOVE a woman with big hips, thighs, ass, all of it. If I am dating a woman and she says she has gained 10kg and I am thinking about just mo ass fo me to luv. But if you are taking two pairs of jeans and stitching them together to make on pair....or if you can’t see that bone that sticks out from your ankle, but your upper body is really thin...I’m not drinking the water anymore. Has to be some parasite or virus causing that deformity. If all of them were that big, it would just be a really big woman. No big deal, I’ve seen many of those before in my life. But that whole mixmatch thing is not cool. Matter of fact it’s downright scary. I know! It was like in that movie with Eddie Murphy where he played Prof. Klump and he took that potion to be thin and after awhile it started wearing off....THAT is what a lot of females in Costa Rica look like. Now where are the scientists to explain that huh?!
3.) Costa Rica is a country that borders both the Pacific and the Atlantic Oceans. It is amazing how different the beaches are on either coast. On the Atlantic side the water is always much warmer and calmer than the Pacific side. But if you are a surfer, you have to be on the Pacific side. One constant thing is, no good looking women go to the beach in Costa Rica. I have gone to quite a few beaches here, the Atlantic and Pacific side...Seems like ONLY the women who should not be wearing bikinis are at the beach! All the attractive women stay in the cities. Or maybe there are special days for certain types of bodies on the beach and I don’t realize it. I am not talking about perfect 10 bodies, I just mean normal. I am saying that women who wear normal bottom bikinis look like they are wearing G-Strings because their asses got hungry and sucked up all that material. And in the front they look naked cause their stomach is hanging completely over the front of the bathing suit so you only see skin and think they are nude. It’s not just me either. Females from other countries have commented on this as well...the women in the cities who look amazing don’t go to the beach. Maybe because the men act so badly when they have on clothes and they are afraid to be out in swimsuits where those retards might act even more out of line....Damn Ticos!!
4.) Buses are cheap as hell to take in Costa Rica. And buses take you anywhere in this country. You need to get to the smallest village in the furthest corner? Sure you can find 3 buses that will take you there...They have a huge bus centers where you go to catch buses for certain regions of the country. Very straight forward system. For some reason, that organization hasn’t trickled down to the local bus system. I am in Heredia; it is the 3rd largest city in the COUNTRY. There are no bus stops anywhere in this city! I will walk down the street and see people standing in the most random places. I will ask what is this about... waiting for work, some type of group finishing a meeting. No, they are waiting for the bus. Go back to that place tomorrow to catch that bus...they aren’t there! Who decides where the stop is day to day?! Why does it have to be a secret?! Why can’t they just keep it in one spot?! Who are they trying to keep off the bus?!!? I have really researched this. I have looked all over the city for strange marks
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